Five years Alhamdulillah :-)

Alhamdulillah five years ago, on this day I got married to my husband. It took me quite a long time to find him :-) I used to tell my friend at university and at work, that I may never get married and live for the rest of my life with 99 cats! I don't know where I got this idea from but I was indeed quite worried about my future. I have always been a big fan of children. For me the biggest fear was the prospect of being childless forever! I have seen quite a lot of brothers through family and friends. The more I was going through these meetings, I was getting frustrated thinking this is not really working for me and love is just a myth! Alhamdulillah going to hajj in 2006 has made me help put things into perspective. I started to think more seriously about the purpose of my life. I even wrote in my diary that marriage is not an ultimate goal for me anymore. Before that time, I used to think only through marriage I can become a better Muslimah as if no other option is left for me to serve my Creator. I came to know that marriage is a sunnah not a fard (obligatory). So I decided that I would just concentrate in getting closer to Allah swt.

Alhamdulillah going to hajj and staying there with my dad for a month has changed my life forever. Alhamdulillah it has been a great time for me to reflect and ponder about my future. I met some amazing people during that time. They all have inspired me and helped me to rethink about my life and all the expectations I had. When I came back, I was really missing my time in Makkah and Madinah. Life in London felt so spiritually bankrupt! I stopped working full time as a teacher and started part time work. I started seeking more knowledge of my faith through attending circles at my local mosque. I didn't actively look for a partner either. But through my dad I came to know about my husband. Alhamdulillah we have talked to each other at our place twice and we did do our istikhara ( prayer for guidance) couple of times. I wasn't really sure that this will work out for me so didn't really had that many hope. But alhamdulillah we both were okay with each other and decided to go forward! Alhamdulillah we are still very happy with each other.

 Alhamdulillah we do treat each other as best friends. But I do believe that  he is also my guardian . My faith has taught me that my husband is responsible for taking care of me and  my responsibility towards him is to listen to him. Insha-Allah through loving him and listening to him ( apart from anything which goes against our faith), I hope to please Allah (SWT). Being married for five years, I have learnt a lot about life and most importantly about myself. Sometimes we tend to get too much carried away with the whole wedding stuff but marriage should be the priority for all of us especially the future husband and the wife! Now after five years of marriage I truly understand how difficult but at the same time how significant married life is! Now I can at least understand why marriage is regarded as the half of our faith (deen). Being a mother of three kids all under the age of 4 also taught me so much about myself. I do have my days where everything seems so hard . But also I have my days where I feel so delighted watching my children growing up alhamdulillah. Sometimes it just seems to be a dream to me. Allah swt has blessed me with so much! Alhamdulillah All Praise Belongs To Him and Only Him! I hope to be grateful to Him by spending every moment of my life thanking Him and obeying His commands, INSHA-ALLAH! May Allah swt keep us happy and blessed forever! Everything is from Allah swt . La hawla wa la quwwata illah billah... we cannot do anything good without His Help and we cannot save ourselves from anything bad without His Help. God is the Great Allahu Akbar!
"My Rabb! Grant me the power and ability that I may be grateful for Your Favour which You have bestowed upon me and my parents and that I may do righteous good deeds such as please You and make my offspring good. Truly I have turned to You in repentance and truly I am one of the Muslims. " [Qur'an Al-Ahqah:15]