Ruqyah for children

Recently I did a research on Ruqyah and alhamdulillah found a lot of useful information. Alhamdulillah Allah swt has blessed us with beautiful, healthy children. Sometimes I do feel worried for them . Insha-Allah as our beloved prophet Mohammad saw has recommended, I will try to do as much dua as possible for their well-being and good Islamic upbringing.

Ruqyah consists of words said or written in the form of dua (supplication) or dhikr (remembrance of Allah SWT) for the purpose of protection and cure. It is sometimes accompanied with certain actions such as blowing or wiping over someone to whom it is applied. Our Prophet (SAW) warned against ruqyahs which involve shirk (associating partners with Allah SWT). There are some important conditions that must be satisfied for a ruqyah to be permissible. According to Ibn Hajar (RA), there is a consensus among the ‘ulama that a ruqyah is permissible when it satisfies three conditions:


1. It should be with Allah’s (SWT) words (the Qur’an) or using His names and attributes.
2. It should be in Arabic or of an intelligible meaning.
3. One must believe that it does not have an independent power by itself, but by Allah’s (SWT) will.
Ruqyah from the Qur’an

Surah Al-Fatihah - (Surah 1)
Ayat ul-Kursi – (Surah 2:255)
Surah Ikhlas – (Surah 112)
Surah Falaq – (Surah 113)
Suran Nas – (Surah 114)

The last three surahs of the Qur’an are called mu’awwithat (‘the protecting ones’)

The Prophet (SAW) said, “Say the mu’awwithat three times in the evening and in the morning. This will protect you from all (harmful) things.”

Aishah (RA) reported: “When Allah’s Messenger (SAW) went to bed, he would bring the palms of both hands together and blow into them while reciting ‘Qul huwa Llahu ahad’, ‘Qul a’uthu bi rabbi l-falaq’, and ‘Qul a’uthu bi rabb in’Naas’. He would then rub with them whatever he could reach of his body, starting with his head, face and the front of his body. He would do this three times. When he was too ill, he asked me to do this for him.” – (Bukhari and Muslim)

Abu Said al-Khudri (RA) reported: “Allah’s Messenger (SAW) used to seek Allah’s protection from jinns and evil eye with various supplications until the two mu’awwithat were revealed. After that he (SAW) adhered to them and left everything else.” – (At-Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah)

Abu Said al-Khudri (RA) reported that Jibril (AS) visited the prophet (SAW) while sick and said to him, “O Muhammad, are you sick?” He replied, “Yes” Jibril (AS) said:
“Bismillahi arqik, min kullishay’in yu’thik, min sharri kulli nafsin aw ‘ayni haasid”

– “With Allah’s Name I shelter you, from all that ails you, from the evil of any soul and that of the envious eye. May Allah cure you; with Allah’s Name I shelter you.” – (Muslim)

‘Uthman Bin ‘Affan (RA) reported that Allah’s Messenger (SAW) said: “Nothing would harm a slave who says three times every morning and evening:
‘Bismillah il-lathi laa yadurru ma’ asmihi shay’un fil ardi wala fis-sama’I wahuw as-sami ul-alim’

– ‘I shelter myself with the name of Allah, the One with whose name nothing can cause harm or earth or in the heaven. He is the Healer, the Knower.’” – (Abu Dawud and at-Tirmidhi)

Prophet (SAW) has taught us how to avoid the evil eye. Children are especially vulnerable to the evil eye. The supplications we can do for our children are given below:

‘Abdullah Bin ‘Abbas (RA) reported that the Prophet (SAW) sought Allah’s protection for his grandchildren, al-Hasan (RA) and al-Husayn (RA), with the same supplication that Ibrahim (AS) said for his children Ismail (AS) and Ishaq (AS):
“U’ithukuma bikalimati illah it-taammah, min kulli shaytaanin wa-haammah, wa min kulli ‘aynin laammah”

- “I shelter both of you with Allah’s complete words from every devil and harmful creature, and from every envious eye.” - (Bukhari)
And Allah (SWT) tells us that upon delivering Maryam (AS), her mother sought Allah’s protection for her and her descendents from Satan:

“Allahumma inni u-idhuha [hu] bika wa dhurriyyataha [hu] mina’sha-shaytani’r-rajiim(i).”

- “O Allah, I put her [him], and her [his] progeny under Your protection from Satan, the accursed”

- (Qur’an Surah 3:36)

The tale of an unplanned homebirth

This time last year, I was counting down my days until I could see my baby for the first time. My daughter was due on 11th April and on 9th, I was busy shopping and gardening the whole day. The day I go shopping, I really try to avoid cooking and prefer to eat out, but on that day, eating out seemed impossible and that made me very annoyed. I just realised how dependant I was on eating out! Anyway, like any other pregnant woman I was very hungry by the time I reached home and decided to cook a proper three course meal as if to prove that I can do better than the restaurants that I would have gone to! I cooked quite a lot which was going to last at least couple of days. At that time, I didn’t have a clue that my baby was going to arrive on the same day! Allah (SWT) makes things happen for a reason, Subhanallah.


By the time I went to bed which was around 11, I was having quite a lot of pain and was going to the toilet a lot and that is why I thought it was just tummy ache for some unknown reason. When the pain started to increase, then I thought maybe this is it but just started to use the breathing techniques I had learned watching endless pregnancy and birth programmes on TV. It was going quite smoothly and I thought I was in control. But by 12, I was pretty sure that it was labour pains and not indigestion. I woke my hubby up and sent him to get his mother as we had to leave our 16 month old son with her at home. I thought I had at least 6-7 hours in hand, as my previous pregnancy had been induced and was over in 3 hours. I thought that as this would be a ‘normal birth’ this time, I would have as long as most other people have. However, by 1 am, I started bleeding and my waters broke! I was in severe pain and I was feeling a tremendous pressure at the lower end as if the baby was almost ready to come out. The pain was so intense that I couldn’t stand or sit; I just lied down on my bedroom floor and started groaning. I wonder what the neighbours were thinking! My poor son was watching me from his cot and must have felt quite shocked seeing me behaving so unusual. Luckily I had my mobile with me so I called 999. This was the first time I had ever had to dial 999 in my life. I was really in shock thinking, is this really happening to me or is it just a nightmare!

Alhamdulillah my husband arrived with my mum-in-law just before the paramedics came. We were told that there wasn’t that much time left as they were able to see baby’s head so I stared pushing in accordance with the contractions. I was asking for gas and air. I was very scared thinking about the possibility of going through labour without gas and air! Alhamdulillah they were able to provide that for me. By 1:10 AM I was fully dilated and alhamdulillah our beautiful baby girl was born by 1:30. My husband told me later that she was all blue when she came out as the umbilical cord was wrapped around her neck. The paramedics remained calm though and massaged her chest a bit and alhamdulillah within a couple of seconds she started crying. It was such a relief Subhanallah! I still cannot believe it. With my first labour I had a bad experience with stitches. That’s why this time I strongly refused to have any stitches. Alhamdulillah I was healed very quickly. The trick is you have to keep the place clean and dry and try to have warm bath with a little bit of salt on a regular basis.

The whole process, from the first stage of labour to the third stage, lasted only two and a half hours! I felt like the luckiest mum in the world, alhamdulillah! I still think it was a miracle. I always thought this can only happen in movies. By 3:30, I had my bath and was enjoying my time with my newborn baby. Having an induced labour at hospital with my first baby, I was able to compare the two birth experiences. As it was such an unplanned sort of homebirth, I felt very scared as everything was happening so quickly. But when I compare this one with my induced one I think this one was far better alhamdulillah.

Watching programmes on homebirths and reading about homebirths, I was thinking about homebirth at the beginning of my second pregnancy. However, as midwives suggested not trying homebirth given my previous history of gestational diabetes and pre-eclampsia, I had to change my mind. But now, alhamdulillah going through this accidentally I think it was the best way to have my baby. I felt comfortable being at home. Some medical experts do believe that giving birth in familiar surroundings can raise your confidence during labour, make us feel more in control, if all is proceeding well and make us feel less inhibited: all of which can help ease labour. Moreover, there's a far lower incidence of medical intervention in homebirths, whether that’s having our waters broken (with my first one I had it done), electronic foetal monitoring (I hated it), medication or episiotomies. In terms of privacy, homebirth can be really good. I was surrounded by ladies, which created a ‘sisterly’ environment mashallah. All the paramedics who came were women, as were the two midwives who came later to check everything was alright with me and my daughter. I was lucky that this happened as this probably would not have been the case if this was planned. A significant advantage of a home birth is that you can start your recovery process in the comfort of your own home straight away. After the hard work of delivery, it can make all the difference to be settled into your own bed and sheets, alhamdulillah. I was also very lucky to have my mum and mum-in-law cooking and helping me in almost everything.

My husband was there throughout the labour which I really appreciate. I strongly believe husbands should be birth partners as this can help them appreciate what their mothers and wives and hopefully one day, their precious daughters will go through. It also helps guys to create a better bond as fathers with their newborn. I was very lucky to have my families around. I didn’t need to go to the hospital and my daughter was doing very well too. I am very grateful to Allah (SWT) for making things so easy for me, alhamdulillah. Homebirth is on rise through out the world as more and more women want to have the birth as naturally as possible. But this is not an option for everyone as some women can have complications during their pregnancy and hospital is the best place for them. However, I am trying to learn more about homebirth, as I hope and pray that I can have planned homebirth in future INSHA-ALLAH.

Chicken Biriyani

Chicken biryani is my all time favourite. I love making this recipe whenever I get chance especially for guests. You can even make it one day early to save you from hassle and it actually tastes better the next day. You can serve this biryani with mint yoghurt and a salad of cucumber, tomatoes and red onion chopped very finely.
Ingredients
1 chicken (cut into 8 pieces)
1 medium onion
1 cup (250ml) thick yoghurt
1 teaspoon (5ml) chilli powder
1 teaspoon (5ml) garam masala
2.5cm (1 inch) piece of fresh ginger root, peeled and grated
1 tablespoon (15ml) garlic paste
1 teaspoon (5ml) turmeric
3 tablespoons (60ml) vegetable oil (or butter)
6 cups basmati rice
2 teaspoons roughly chopped fresh coriander
1 teaspoon roughly chopped mint
1 tablespoon black peppercorn
2 cinamon sticks
4 cardamom pods
a pinch of saffron
3 tablespoon fried onion for garnising
some roasted chashew nuts
Fried onion for garnishing
Water according to need

Method
- Cut the chicken into 8 pieces
- Cut the onion into small pieces.
- Mix the yoghurt, chilli powder, turmeric powder , garam masala, half the ginger, half the garlic to make a paste in a bowl.
- Make some cuts in the chicken pieces and rub the paste that you just made over the pieces.
- Let the paste soak into the chicken for 30 minutes. Sometimes I keep it in the fridge for a day.
- Heat half of the oil in a frying pan over a medium heat and lightly brown the onion. Add the rest of the ginger, garlic and some cinamon sticks and cardamom pods.
- Stir-fry for just for couple of minutes until you can smell the spices and then add the chicken pieces and cook until it’s tender.
- In another pan, boil some water (2 litres) with 1 teaspoon salt, some black pepper corn. Add the washed basmati and cook till it’s a bit firm then drain the rice.
- Now to assemble the chicken biryani, get some herbs such as coriander, mint chopped and some ginger root grated and fried onion. You can also add some saffron mixed with warm milk to add a beautiful golden orange colour to the dish. In a large, thick bottom pan, make a layer of rice topped with the chicken cooked previously, then sprinkle the chopped herbs, ginger, fried onion and saffron, then cover it with some more rice and sprinkle the rest of the saffron milk.
- Reduce the heat to a gentle simmer, cover the pan with foil and its lid and leave it to cook very slowly for one hour. You can cook it in the oven at gas mark 5.
- Just before serving, mix the biryani lightly with a wooden spoon and spread the biryani in a wide dish, topped with fried onion, roasted cashew nuts (optional) and chopped corainder.
- Serve hot. I like to serve my biryani with yughurt and mint sauce . Enjoy :-)

Easy chocolate cake with caramel cream

This a very easy recipe which can be quite a popular cake for any gathering. My mum-in-law makes yummy cakes and I have learned quite a lot from her recipes. This one is inspired by one of her cakes which I thoroughly enjoyed eating every bit of it as it had caramel in it ! From my experience, chocolate cakes are liked by almost everyone. So do enjoy making and serving this delicious cake insha-Allah. This one can serve up to 12 people.

Ingredients
6 oz self-raising flour
2 oz unsweetened cocoa powder
8 oz caster sugar
8 oz butter
1 tablespoon baking powder
2 teaspoons vanilla essence
4 eggs
A good quality chocolate bar
7- 8 tablespoons of coke
Roasted almond flakes

Ingredients for caramel cream
600 ml double cream
198 gm caramel (half of a regular tin)

Method

- Preheat oven to 350 deg F (Gas mark 4 or 180 deg C).
- Grease a 9 inch (23 cm) cake tin.
- Mix everything together until smooth, either by hand or by using an electric mixer at slow speed.
- Transfer to bake tin and bake at 350 degrees until a wooden pick inserted in centre comes out clean, after approximately 40 to 45 minutes.
- In the meantime, make the caramel cream by whipping the double cream with caramel. You can add 1 teaspoon of vanilla essence in the cream.
- After the cake has cooled, cut the cake into two layers, add some coke to make it a bit moist .
- Use one 1/3 of the caramel cream between the two layers, 1/3 on top, and the rest around the cake.
- Sprink roasted almond flakes all over the cake.
- Using a grater, you can make some tiny chocolate pieces and sprinkle on top of the cake.
- Keep the cake in the fridge and take it out just before serveing. Enjoy !

Joys and sorrows(!?) of having children close to each other in age :-)

When I discovered that I was pregnant with my second child while my first one was 8 months old, I was full of mixed feelings. I was feeling very excited thinking about having another little angel but at the same time I was worried. How on earth I was going to cope with two babies! What was I thinking!? The reactions I received from people around me were not that positive either. Some argued it would be a very difficult task to look after two and some even thought it must have been unplanned! It did annoy me hearing these negative comments but overall Alhamdulillah, I was coping well with the news as I always believe Allah (SWT) does not burden any soul with more than they can cope with.

I am the eldest among my five siblings and so I was already quite experienced in looking after babies. On top of that, I was already in ‘new mother mode’ with my first child under 1 year old, so having another one would simply mean doing everything twice. Alhamdulillah I was also very lucky to have a very supportive husband. He did most of the chores and looked after our eldest one during the pregnancy. I was also helped by family and very good friends.

In the beginning, I did have moments where I doubted my ability to handle two very young children. During the first couple of days after birth of my second baby, I used to feel very sorry for my eldest one. Looking into his teary eyes, I felt I was a bad mother and neglecting him as he was very attached to me. He had no competition for my (and everyone else’s for that matter) attention prior to the birth and it was a big change for him. As I was also breastfeeding my second one, I couldn’t give that much time to my son for first couple of days, and so it must have appeared to him that I had forgotten him. I was also feeling very exhausted being a new mum again. A positive consequence of the second child was that my son’s relationship with his dad grew stronger and he became less dependent on me, to the extent that he is now strongly attached to him! This meant that there was less pressure on me than I had originally expected.

Alhamdulillah things were not that bad, thanks to family and friends. I am lucky to have both of my families quite nearby. My mother-in-law stayed with us for the first couple of days and helped out. My mother cooked yummy food for us. Alhamdulillah we are very lucky to have them. For us, our son being in the company of his grandparents was a great sense of relief. Through this experience, I have learnt a lot Alhamdulillah.

Eventually, I was able to balance my time and share time with both of my kids. It was also quite good for my son too. He has learnt to be more independent and considerate of others’ need. He tries to share his toys and food with his sister.

My son is now 27 months and my daughter is almost 12 months, Alhamdulillah. Being so close in age has also helped my daughter in learning new skills as she is always following her brother in almost everything! She has already started walking mashallah while my son learnt to walk around 13 months. She is also trying her best to climb up the stairs, chasing after her brother. To sum it up, she is desperately trying to be like her brother which means it is hopefully going to be less hassle for me as my children will grow up quickly Insha-Allah. We are enjoying our life a lot as we are always busy with our children. Alhamdulillah they are the biggest joy in our life.

Having a good birth partner

Giving birth can be a very difficult experience for a woman and is often quite painful. You may feel scared and stressed due to fear of unknown especially if you are a first time mother. That’s why it is very important to have a supportive birth partner who understands the difficulties of labour and the actual birth process. Having a good partner makes a huge difference during labour, from the first stage of contractions to the moment you get to see your baby for the first time Alhamdulillah!


I have been blessed with two children Alhamdulillah. My husband was there for me during the two births. My first one was quite scary as I didn’t know what to expect. Although I tried to research what to expect, my birth experience wasn’t that common. I was admitted to the hospital when I was 34 weeks pregnant due to high blood pressure (pre-eclampsia). The consultant suggested that I should have an induced labour. I wasn’t very happy with this, as I thought there were still four more weeks to go and I wanted things to take their natural course. However we didn’t have any choice left. I was feeling quite upset and scared. My husband was there throughout that time which meant a lot to me. I think during these sorts of moments, I feel closer to Allah (SWT) than normally. There is no one who can help us when we go through such a hard time and I am grateful to Allah (SWT) for his help and mercy. In the case of my first child, the whole process from first contractions to birth was four hours, which I learned later is significantly shorter than most people. In the case of my second child, it was even shorter… For this, I thank Allah for easing my pain.

I also thank Allah (SWT) for having blessed me with a supportive husband to act as my birth partner. I felt comfortable having him beside me to support me and I think it also helped him to understand more how much pain and suffering a mother needs to go through during labour. I know sisters who would prefer their mother or sister, or even their best friend to be there for them during delivery, but I think I would feel uncomfortable anyone else being there, as I think only my husband can see me in such an awkward state.

Having said that, it is someone’s choice who she would prefer to be with her during labour, as this is probably the most stressful time that any woman will probably face in their life and she needs to feel comfortable and that there is someone there to provide her with the support that she needs. Whatever you may prefer, it is best to decide who the birth partner will be early on in the pregnancy, so that you can inform the person in advance and plan everything accordingly. They can ensure that the bag is packed and ready in the last few weeks of pregnancy, ready for the big day!

My precious sisters

Today one of my sisters in deen called me to see how I am doing. Talking to her I felt very good. Yesterday I was feeling really sad and today her call felt like my Lord (swt) has inspired her to call me, alhamdulillah! She has given me some very good naseeha and told me to be patient and keep making dua to Allah (swt). It reminded me the chapter in the Qur'an Al-Asr where Allah swt tells us to have sabr(patience) and keep reminding each other to keep up the good work and believe in Him(swt).

Alhamdulillah I am so lucky to have such wonderful sisters in deen. Whenever I have any problem in my life, they are always there for me, alhamdulillah. May Allah (swt) reward them for being so nice to me despite all of my shortcomings! Having good company is very important. My precious sisters, through their behaviour and action remind me again and again how important it is to have a good opinion of Allah (swt) and try to be a better muslimah. I hope INSHA-ALLAH we will be sisters forever and will meet in jannah, our ultimate destination!